Merry Christmas

Subj:    Have a very Beaumont Dave Christmas
Date:    97-12-24 20:37:55 EST

When you hear the rooster crowing, don't race to your Christmas tree, look up in the sky. (On second thought, don't look up; you might not like what's falling).

It's Beaumont Santa and his team of eight tiny Rein-chicken. They're coming to tell you that Beaumont Dave sends out joy and glad tidings all 365 days of the year and not to expect anything special, just because it's Dec. 25.

If he could, he'd give you all a big chicken in your pants ... but really that's something we all have in our power, so if you really want that old warm feeling inside for Christmas, get your own chicken!!

Like all these other me-toos, he says he has really enjoyed spending his idle time jabbering with you guys. You've made him realize great things about himself, mostly that he's not nearly as twisted as you give him credit for being.

Here's hoping that you all get whatever (whoever) you want for Christmas, and that you and yours live long and cackle (if that's their persuasion), and we'll meet again under this big star-filled canopy we call a SGVA-200 or whatever and relive more of the good times yet to come.

Ah, what the hell, it's been fun makin' loads of new friends. Lookin' for more in '98.

Your fine feathered friend,
Beaumont Dave